The morning got off to a very promising start. I was able to spring out of bed (that’s in MY mind) without an ‘AaaYAHHH!’ to be heard. Straight into the shower I went with a ‘hey nonny no’ and a ‘tra, la, la’ and just in case you are envisioning some overcrowding therein, I should perhaps just have said that I was singing. I must explain something here. I sing a lot – no matter how stressed. I can always drag up an appropriate lyric and tune to fit the mood. So, two or three songs later, I am drying off to ‘While Shepherds Washed their Socks by Night’ and rejoicing in the fact that I was actually reaching all the way down to my feet (with nary a twinge) when it dawned upon me that I had no moisturiser with which to anoint (or iron out) the body. Continue reading
nana
Parking is such sweet sorrow…
‘ Is that you all sorted for Christmas then?’ If I, in this season of goodwill, wish to be mischievous and spread misery, despair and panic then I answer ‘Yes!’ to this most irritating of questions, all the while smiling broadly. People (noticeably) ‘go off you’. You might get a very dry, ‘Oh, good for you…’ or, ‘I might have known you’d have everything done!’ or ‘Well, you’ve got nothing else to do with your time….’. I let them wallow briefly before admitting my real situation. Those who know me best say simply, ‘Aye right…pull the other one….’ Continue reading
It’s a Rollover…
Now, be honest! Who can truthfully say that they have never asked, implored, or beseeched the Good Lord to let them win The Lottery? Surely it can’t just be me! I have even resorted to a little blackmail: Dear Lord, if you let me win this week, I will see to it that others get a share. You see I’m not remotely greedy, I just want to be the ‘Bringer of Wealth and Joy’ to the world… well the nation….. county?…town?….street?…neighbour? NO ONE PERSON needs a prize of forty seven million pounds but let ME win and I’ll start by making forty six other unsuspecting people, millionaires! I think that is a very reasonable argument. (Some of you, with a maths degree, may have noticed that I am holding onto a million for myself -well giving it ALL away would be quite mad don’t you think?) Continue reading
foxonasoapbox 