I’ve been trying to choose a starting point. Should it be Europe, America, Syria,the NHS, Teaching, Gender Disappointment (!), Nature v. Nurture, Whistle Blowers, Saving the UK from  Aliens ( BBC Radio 4 Play, starring one Nicola Sturgeon (yes, the very same) as yet to be broadcast, Immigration, the Oscars….  or people who begin every sentence with the word,’So’…………!!!!!       

So, I’m sitting at my desk trying to anchor all the stuff that’s swirling around inside my overstuffed head. So now I feel a list coming on…… should I deal with what’s in my head first or organise the clutter around me. So let me explain about the clutter. Last Thursday, myself and team went over to my other premises (the storage unit), in order to clear it out once and for all. So there were roughly eight large boxes to be emptied, a large unit, five assorted tables and some bookshelves to be disposed of.

We got to work. Much treasure was found in the boxes: some china, some crystal, a tea urn, enough table linen and curtains to make costumes for ‘The Sound of Music’, a plethora of soft toys (my youngest is forty five!)lamps, retirement cards, birthday cards, ‘high heels'( which I would need to be ‘lowered’ into now –  I cannot believe I walked and danced in those torture boxes – (but the bunions are here to prove that I did!) So what else….oh yes, more sheet music, some Hornby bits and bobs, a witch’s hat, velvet cat ears a magic wand and something Joe’s been fretting about these past forty five years …….. ‘Action Man’s’ jacket! Virtually nothing was thrown out. So the boxes were all brought home along with three of the tables….. hence the clutter. So I’ll be paying for storage for at least another month by the looks of things!!

So I’m rubbish at letting go but do it I must…..Top of the list then: clear the clutter. So… okay, where to start…. So maybe I’ll make another list…… start with….. sheet music …..so, d’you know what?……. I can’t bring myself to throw out music – it stays. So next…. curtains…… I know I need to pull myself together but I’m turning a blind eye to the drapery -it stays. So now ….retirement cards …..oh no…. I need to read them through first – they stay. So there’s the Hornby and the cool jacket…… well those stay – obviously – we can’t have Joe in a wee cream puff.!…… Suffering Succotash this is not going well and now my head is pounding, my eyes are smarting and my tongue seems to have absorbed all the saliva in my mouth -yessss!! – it’s teatime! Another break…….

I need an IRP – (hope all you dyslexic readers out there get that right!) So, yes an IRP, an Individual Retirement Programme -some kind of supervised timetable with elaborate plans to follow, even though it means a) curbing spontanaity and initiative and joy, b) pushing forward regardless, c) working long into the night to be able to tick yet another meaningless box or score an item off a neverending list while completely losing sight of the who, the what and the why, d) having one’s complaints and opinions and experience looked upon as moans and scepticism and ageing e) and then have someone who has never been in your situation for years ( and when they were, couldn’t keep hens in a close) come and tell you how ‘badly’ you’re doing things and… and….STOP!!!…

..This is beginning to sound like … like…. exactly what I retired from.!… I’m obviously suffering from PMT(…er…. I think not!) PQRS…T ( excellent idea!) , SPQR (didn’t the Romans use that -gosh my memory’s longer than I thought!) PTSD -Post Teaching Stress Disorder – that’s it!! In the name of the wee man in the mountains why would I want a timetable now! Am I mad?…(answers on a postcard please).I am assuredly having flashbacks……so what has triggered them off….. the cat’s ears..?….the magic wand..?…or most likely…. the witch’s hat!….. yeah! That brings back memories of ‘her’…..and the one before ‘her’, (HT’s to be precise!)…. yes, the pointy hat would have fitted both perfectly. I can see them now, suited and booted (if only!) with their spelling …sorry, I mean spell books at the ready….enough of that. Let’s continue to sweep all under the educational carpet with yet another new broom ………just for the time being……

So meanwhile, back at the clutter……the harmless clutter will be cleared in due course….. and after more tea. This I have decided …… and I know that  God is on my side for he has inspired ‘The Good Fairy’ to make cup cakes and share them with me …… and time spent with loved ones is priceless. It is these little unplanned and spontaneous happenings that bring great joy to tiny corners of this chaotic world of ours, a little reminder that we can all bring a little ‘cup cake of hope’ by a simple act of selflessness to whomever and to wherever. I would dearly love to solve all the big, overwhelming issues of our planet in one fell swoop. I can’t……but each day I am given ‘the present’  and the chance to make a difference in my own little world….. SO.!!!!….onwards and upwards…… PS. I am SO sick of all the SO and SO’s in my article –  let’s cut them out .!!…….but I’ve begun with cutting out the So and SO’s in my life!…… SO there!! x